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  • Writer's pictureLola

Identity Develops Over Time


Very, very incognito.

Before I ever had the confidence to believe I could build a therapy practice targeting people having Mixed Race experiences, I blogged anonymously under the name, Neither/Both. This blog had a number of homes, but I always took it down out of fear of connecting my private, personal thoughts with my professional identity. But I always kept copies.


Today, when appropriate, I share many of these thoughts with my clients and in community. Because it's important to speak up and let people know that even in their experiences most deeply rooted in shame, they are not alone.


Every once in a while I go back and look at these old writings, and it's interesting to see the way my own identity has developed and expanded over time. Each of these old posts is like a time capsule. Some of my beliefs have remained unchanged. And with some of those writings, I can pinpoint specific experiences that changed the way I thought about my own racial identity. Our stories are the best illustrations of how identity development works.


I'll be re-posting several old blogs in the coming weeks, sometimes standing alone, and sometimes with commentary on how my experiences illustrate different stages of identity development theory. I hope that sharing my own experience can help others.

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